THE SKY IS FALLING

THE PANIC IS HERE! THE PANIC IS HERE! THIS IS NO CHICKEN LITTLE MOMENT.  EVERYONE REMAIN CALM… or you could always… PANIC!!!!!

RUN TO THE STORE! FIND THE STORE CLOSEST TO YOU AND GRAB THE GENERATORS, WATER PURIFIERS, AND PORTABLE TOILETS   FIRST!

WHAT HAS ONSET THIS PANIC?!?

  • A FEAR OF SOURNESS- ACEROPHOBIA
  • A FEAR OF THE POPE – PAPAPHOBIA
  • A FEAR OF PEANUT BUTTER STICKING TO THE ROOF OF YOUR MOUTH- ARACHIBUTYROPHOBIA (try to say that four times fast)
  • GIANT SPIDERS OVERTAKING YOUR LOCAL MCDONALDS- THE DOLLAR MENU INSANITY!
  • BEN CHOOSING COURTNEY ON THE BACHELOR FINALE
  • YOU LOST YOUR FAVORITE PAIR OF SOCKS
  • NO CLEAN TOWELS AND GUESTS ARE COMING

WITH ALL THIS PANIC RUNNING AMUCK, THIS IS NO TIME FOR READING A BLOG.  GO PANIC SOME WHERE.  SCREAM AT PEOPLE UNREASONABLY.  PUSH OVER SHELVES IN A GROCERY STORE. START LIGHTING THINGS ON FIRE AND THEN SCREAM “WHO LIT THAT ON FIRE?!?!” THIS IS A PANIC.  ANYTHING GOES.

Today is also World DJ Day, so please allow DC’s DJ Chris Styles set the beat for the rest of your panic.  Please remember to always panic responsibly.

 

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