Old is the new Young

A man was walking along a road trying to find his way in Greece when suddenly he was accosted a great wind caused by the angered wings of a creature so strong and powerful that moving any step further forward was impossible. The man was face to face with the Spinx, and as he stared deep in to the pair of intelligent eyes looking back at him, he knew that he only had one chance to survive.  Legend has it the Sphinx would sit outside Thebes and ask a riddle of everyone that passed by.  If they answered correctly, the Sphinx would kill itself allowing the traveler to pass.  To answer incorrectly meant death.  As the man, Oedipus, looked deep in to the Sphinx’s very alive eyes, he knew that no man that had ever lived this five minutes of his life had ever seen the next five minutes after this moment.  Without moving its lips, the Sphinx would ask the question, a riddle that had unhinged countless travelers before.
What has four legs in the morning, two legs in the afternoon, and three legs at night?
Only then did Oedipus smile because he knew the answer.  With a subtle nod of his head, he announced “a man.”  The Sphinx reeled as though shot through the heart with an arrow and was destroyed.  The answer to so many of life’s questions including which gender are the better drivers is men (That’s right.  I am calling it haha).  The creature with four legs in the morning is a baby, two legs is a grown up standing on their own two feet, and once night falls an elderly man takes a cane to continue walking.  The riddle outlines the life of a man.  To all of the people reading my blog, happy As Young As You Feel Day.
I feel pretty old today because I enjoy cranberry juice, mid day dinner specials, and watching a little late night Jeopardy before falling asleep in my recliner.  As a result, I will keep this post short since I only type with one finger, as an old person would and may have even fallen asleep by 9PM.  I am too forgetful to remember.  Oh, and you  may notice the lack of links.  I figured someone who was really old… like 125 may not even know what links are.  In honor of them, I have included none today.  Hopefully I will feel younger tomorrow.
The moment I knew I was getting old was when I could no longer eat 32 pieces of pizza at an all you can eat pizza buffet and still be ready to eat again in an hour.  I could probably still knock back 32 pieces but I would be in a bit of pain for a couple hours after.  Besides, now that I am older and more mature, I would probably rather save some of those pieces for breakfast the next day.  Breakfast is the most important meal of the day.
I have done a lot of research and have found ten sure fire ways to feel younger at any age. Check them out below:
1.
Oops, I was too busy goofing off and ran out of time to write them all out.  Next time.  In honor of National Goof Off Day, I took one additional ten minute break today at work.  I am quite the goof off I know.  It was a national holiday.  What else could I do?!?! And I certainly did not make up for it by working a little extra on another day.  That would be silly talk.
Now if you ever face a Sphinx while walking along the street, you will survive to see another day because even you know the answer to the riddle.